Deleted Segment

An epilogue I was toying with, but then most of these themes managed to express themselves in the body of the story. 


In which Jericho has a heart-to-heart with his … authority figure.



Um, excuse me.


Yes?


Still around, dude.


Apparently. Weird. Maybe if you stop, I don’t know. … Thinking?


Well. I’ve been thinking.


Aha!


No, I mean. About. Enzo. A lot.


Jericho, this is fiction. I was horsing around with you. Maybe if I went too far. I’m sorry. It’ll wear off. I promise. At least, I think. Not really sure, both of you are so -- 


Freakish, man, you can say it.


Unusual. A few days, weeks. You’ll be back to … normal. I … I thought I needed to teach you a lesson. I guess the way you came across, all … perfect and … full of it. Except for your little ‚hangups.‘ Thought I needed to get in there, fix some stuff. Stupid of me.


You really pulled a fast on me this time, you’re right about that  …


Shush! Trying to apologize here. Don’t ruin it. You are. Perfect. The way you are. The most content alone person I know. You’re also absurdly hot stuff ok and I was jealous and frankly I wanted to get up your ass.


Who doesn't, these days.


Metaphorically! There. 


Actually. I was going to ask whether Enzo's gonna be ok. I know you’re not supposed to tell us, like, endings or anything. I don’t wanna know, ok. It’s fine. But. See. I think I got into his head too. Not like him into me, but. After. Cause all of a sudden I’m. …  Just a little sweet on the guy, you know, and I'm worried that --


I told you. It’ll ... probably … fade.


Um, can you … make it … not. Fade?


Oh. If you like. If you’re sure. 


Y-Yeah. Actually. I am. 


Ok. You do know you’re … feeling ambivalent. And. Frankly. I think the effect he’s had on you. It’s a bit like the effect you have on him. Wanting to share, so bad. Having so much of it to share, you both have no, sorry, but … until I get to it, you have no … vessel to take the overflow. Your hearts are so full of love for the one (or severals or everybodies or whoever ends up being compatible with your own truth) that the … the love for everybody else, that you’re supposed to be able to … that’s your own free choice to give away, or not, depending on who you believe you are. ... Is spilling out all over. Shit, it’s too complicated. That’s why stories get written and not explanations. Stories are truer anyway because they are real, explanations are just … to explain things away most of the time. From your heart, into your head. Stories are … the other way around. Somehow. I’m just a writer, I can’t explain it. I just do it.


… 


You’re trying to say all of us, everybody, you me them, over here, in your parts, has too much love flowing through them to contain and unless they bottle it up or destroy it with hurt or greed or fear or for whatever fucked up reason, it’ll just keep flowing and flowing until you meet and recognize your true other(s) and then you’re complete but you still have enough left over because it’s in reality endless because it’s not really yours to parcel out or keep at all anyway and so you could give it all to the whole world five times over and would still be gushing with it. But once you’re complete and have fulfilled the primary purpose for why you were created, it’ll be your choice how you play the bonus levels. Crystal waters, Dude.


Wow.


Anyway, please, I need to know, will Enzo figure it out or have I fucked him up for good now. Because. I couldn’t live with that. If that’s what you’re planning to write, because it sure looks like it from here, then forget it. I'm out. I really quit. No joke. No horses.


Yes.


Yes what? Not kidding around here. Gonna throw myself under a shark next time I’m up on the crests, that kinda not kidding around.


Lesson learned.


You or me?


You, this time. In preparation for your next level. „The blood brothers“. Your … Level Three. Soon.


And Enzo?


Gets to have his fun with you until he meets his … in his case, one. Also quite soon. Not much longer. No more … levels for him to complete except that one, seeing you brought up the gaming metaphor. He just needs to grow a bit more. In power and maturity. As do we all. Most of all your writer.


So we’re gonna be just fine, like you promised … whispered into my head … back there. Just different fine.


Yes. You’ll both be just fine. Better. This is, after all, fiction. I promise. See, you didn’t pay attention again. 


Huh?


The new sparkle.


Yeah?


Not just meant for you.


No?


No. He’ll take what you’ve just shown him, or … what he managed to glean through you, on board. It was mostly for him. Seeing himself through your eyes. Who he really is. It’s not so much yet. Not enough. But we have to stay real. Otherwise, this wouldn’t be fiction either. 


What would it be?


Utter nonsense, of course.


Most of it, today, frankly, was nonsense.


True. Maybe. Who knows. Thanks for playing along, then.


Um. Ok. If you say so. I guess. Thanks for … letting me play. Um. With. Us. It was … fun. More. Have some more thinking to do. Which means, I guess, I won’t disappear? 


You won’t disappear. You’ll just go somewhere quiet and think. For a change. A little change is a good thing, don’t you think?


Right. Yeah. Think. Maybe I’ll check in with Enzo first, though. Just make sure he’s … ok. Ok?


You can do whatever you feel like doing. Really feel like. Not just pretending.


So how do I know when it’s real and when I’m just pretending?


That’s the actual question, isn’t.


Yeah I guess. Gonna have to think about … feel about that too. Funny how a even a guy who can feel has trouble sorting it all out, sometimes, you know. Especially he knows most of the time how others feel — or don’t — about him. Makes you wonder where or with who or … heck, whether you really belong at all.


Now don’t you go making a mess around here by spreading a whole bunch of morals around. That would be tacky. 


Hmph.


Like the floor in your wellness pad. You really should clean it up. Someone could slip and fall. If you're out, they might get hurt.


And I thought your whole point of my … exercise was that if only I had been out they wouldn't have. And that's why I had to come and get my ass licked. Kicked. Hmph.


No. Not really. Hadn't thought much about it.


You didn't bother to think about my crystal ass when you wrote that damn scene??


Actually, I thought about it in great detail. I do my research, you know, unlike some.


 So we done here?


For now. And Jericho?


Mhm.


Lay off the ganj for a bit. Seriously. I almost couldn’t get you back out. Your brain was a lot more … susceptible … that I realized. Close call. His pushing himself into your … happy bits. Your synapses were like pudding.


'Happy bits'? Seriously, dude?


Overstimulated axons.


Haven't heard that one before. Peachy pits. So I was trippin'.  


Just a little. Go play some trumpet. Anywhere you want. Just make sure you add that lovin’ vibe. It’ll sound real sweet. Go … tumblin’ some walls …  Damn, you’re hard. 


Don't worry about it. Happens all the time.


To write. 


Wouldn't be fiction if I was too easy, would it. Just silly. 


Smartass. Go.


Be seein' ya round them parts o'mine, uh reckon.


Bet on it.


site content © 2013-15 all intellectual property rights of original material belong exclusively to me, Goesta Struve-Dencher, all rights reserved.